Nothing real specific to write about today, just a rack of things going through my head
Dumb questions that people ask
*house phone rings*
Other person: Wasssup man… where you at?
Me: Fool… you just called me in the house!
I’ve been wolfin’ all week and decided to trim the goatee and moustache on Thursday night. Friday morning I walk into the office.
Co-worker: You shaved?
Person: Where you work at?
Me: (gives name of employer)
Person: What do you do there?
Me: (gives job title)
Person: Y’all hiring?
Me: I dunno, I don’t work in HR
-Why am I all of a sudden in love with the new Snuggle Exhilarations White Lavender & Sandalwood fabric softener? I’m tellin’ you, that stuff makes laundry smell good than a mug!!! (<-old school phrase) I’ve been stuck on Downy’s Simple Pleasures Vanilla and Lavender for about a year now, but I’m about to make a permanent switch.
-Why is it that now I’m starting to eat all the things I’ve hated and refused to eat since I was a kid? I’m making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches at least 3 times a week. I make one with grape jelly and the other with strawberry preserves, and tear em up with a tall glass of milk. I’m also taking cans of tuna fish and mixing it up with mayonnaise and relish and eating that with crackers and tomato slices sprinkled with season salt.
-Why is it so easy for me to get tickets for whatever event I want to get tickets for, but getting a parking pass for the garage at Verizon Center or the lot of FedEx Field seem so difficult? My hook-up man is easy to deal with when we’re talking tickets, but he’s holding parking passes like hostages. It’s easier for me to get another set of tickets, than it is for me to get a spot to park my car on game day.
-Why am I still going to sporting good stores looking for Celtics and Cowboys gear to wear for the games this weekend… cuz the stuff I have in my closet is too small or they’re items I wore at previous games where my teams lost. It seems that every time I wear my Dorsett throwback jersey, the Cowboys lose. I’m not putting that thing on this Sunday when we go to the game. Pretty much the same thing with the Celtics gear. When I wear my Len Bias throwback jersey or my white Celtics warm-up shirt, they lose. I don’t wish to see them lose to the Wizards on Saturday night, so I’ve gotta get some new stuff. Call me superstitious I guess.
– Why did most of the kids who came to my door to get some candy last night have wack costumes? What happened to the days of creative costumes for kids. I remember when I did trick-or-treat Ma at least dressed me for the occasion. These kids today throw on a jersey and decide to be the player whose name is on the back or they wear jeans and a t-shirt with a pointed hat and call themselves witches. No creativity at all. Furthermore, most of them were greedy as hell talkin’ bout “Can I have some more candy” after I gave them a handful of mini Snickers bars.
– Why do I have all these KitKat and Snickers bars in my briefcase and at my desk knowing good and well that I get migraines from eating chocolate? I suppose that’s why I have bottles of Excedrin in my briefcase and on my desk as well.
– Why do wedding photographers charge and arm and a leg? Good Lord!!!! I mean, they want everything but your firstborn child. I want beautiful photographs of our ceremony and reception like everybody else does, but I could almost buy a new car for the prices that some of these jokers are charging. I’m convinced that there’s a monopoly out there among photographers. They probably meet once a month and discuss who they gouged the previous month. It’s crazy!!!
– Why did YouTube ban me? Those suckers disabled my account. Why you ask? They did it because I posted clips from the Redskins-Eagles game on Monday Night Football 4 years ago. The clips were of ME!!!! One was where I was celebrating a touchdown and the other was where I was standing looking confused when the cops sprayed pepper spray on the crowd after a fight broke out in the stands. The said that the material was property of the NFL and thus my posting was infringing upon their copyright. Screw em then. I still got the clips and I’ll just continue to link them from my own site anyway.
– Why am I lovin’ the new Lebron James commercials featuring The Lebrons??? I can’t even front, those joints are funny. Ha ha
I really wonder what ABC7’s Marc Brown was thinking when he saw this flash up on the screen while he was reporting the story. The resemblance is uncanny… ha ha.
Although a big time Cowboys fan, I’m still not a big Terrell Owens supporter. This pic is from the game in Philly when the ‘Boys lost to the Eagles earlier last month. He doesn’t look too happy does he? The pic is still funny as hell to me.
That’s all I got… y’all enjoy your day
9 thoughts on “Abstract thoughts”
U see why u my people..cuz u always making me smile..now how bout them tickets man!!!!!!!HEll i can get basically anything i want..but what i really want i cnat get which is FREE GAS!!!!!!!Anbody got a hookup at a gas station? U watching CEltics season opener vs. the HOrnets…i want tix to the Wizards game….Can u sell me on the COWGIRLS again?
I hate when people ask me if we’re hiring, too. WTF! I’m in Marketing not HR!
Do me a favor and don’t wear your old Celtics gear Friday. OK? I’m going to the game and I would lover to be there to see them win. Especially, since they lost last night. Thanks in advance 🙂
LMAO @ YouTube banning you…LOL!
LOL you’re probably the only man that I know who will admit to using fabric softner and liking it.
Everything related to weddings is a rip off. You will spend WAY more than you want to so just make sure it’s your last wedding:)
I picked the Cowboys over the Skins so whatever you do, make sure they win….OKAY?
I see ya getting your tv shine on!
I need a hookup like yours.
I hate when people ask me “can you get me a job?” Umm..no
Funny thoughts! Daayum, Youtube put you on the ‘black list’ for real!
@ Missy – Sorry, I don’t have any gas station hook-ups. As far as football goes Cowboys > Patriots.
@ Dynasty – Well, I didn’t wear any Celtics gear yesterday and they still lost to the Pistons. Any other bright ideas?
@ Lāā – I have no problems with that. In fact, I bought two more bottles of Snuggle last night.
@ 1969 – I’m learning about the whole weddings monopoly thing. Don’t worry bout the Cowboys, we got this one.
@ Southern gal – The TV shine was pure luck. I had real good seats and they just caught me.
@ Paula D. – Yeah, YouTube is wack to me now. It’s all about DailyMotion.com.
youtube has been bought by google & since they already have enough lawsuits under their belt, they’re probably trying to avoid some more
but damn.. they could’ve at least asked you to remove them before banning you! lol
This whole post had me rolling! You are hilarious. That rape suspect pic was crazy!? I would have died if I saw that on tv!
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